Most Are The Same

Sooooooo, I’ve dated a guy who’s 4yrs older than me, in his 50s and talked to another who’s 30yrs older than me making him in his 80s. You know what? They’re both the same. We’ll call the Fifty and Old School

Now Fifty, I met a work. He came off as a really nice guy. He isn’t my definition of handsome, but he isn’t ugly. I can bear to look at him. He’d make sure I had breakfast, lunch, and dinner. He kept me fed. We’d go out ever once in a while, but not that often. Time spent wasn’t that bad. My only real problem was that I wasn’t sexually attracted to him, and when we were intimate, there was no chemistry. We drank a lot, which was the only time I could have sex with him. I put on drinking weight. He would want to have sex every time we got into bed, and I didn’t. It was to the point where I’d just lay there and stare out the window. When I’d talk about not having a sexual connection, he would say that I was being mean. As the relationship progressed, I became mad. When I didn’t want to have sex I was being accused of sleeping with other men. He’d say that he saw other men coming out of my apartment, and these other men were laughing at him. When and how when he was allllllways at my place and my work hours didn’t allow me to cheat andibd you we worked at the same place. Any man I spoke to, I was sleeping with. Insecure? You me, yes, but to him, he wasn’t. The deeper we got into the relationship, the more he began to lecture me. Lecture me on how I should be nicer(having sex when he wanted to). How I should be doing better…Yada yada. These lectures were lectures a parent would give their child, and of course, I didnt isn’t to hear it. He would also come to my place unannounced. My building had a code, and I lived there and didn’t know it. I’d use my key fob to get into my building, but he knew the code. If I didn’t answer Mr door when he knocked, he’d go downstairs and ring the buzzer until he got tired or he’d call my mother. Fifty crossed and  didn’t respect boundaries. When I’d address the issue, I needed to stop being mean and the lectures would start and he would want to involve my kids into ‘adult conversations’ which I stopped and wanted to call and include my mother. He portrayed himself as a victim, telling her all the nice things he did but would never mention how he didn’t cross or respect my boundaries. Once I told my mother, she understood and was on the same page as me, with him being insecure and controlling. But he continued to lecture until I had enough.

Old school well, we’d go out to eat every now and then. He’d give me a couple of dollars because he wanted to. I didn’t ask him. This was something he said he’d do. When he didn’t, I didn’t say anything. Old school was a really nice guy. He asked me if I like to travel, who doesn’t. He said we’d go to Aruba in October. He said he made the arrangements, but somewhere down the line, it changed. Because of what was going on with the flight delays and all that good stuff because of the current president, we would go to Alantic City or the shore. Mind you, I went on a trip with my kids. He said he’d give me money to help with their birthdays. He didn’t, and I didn’t ask. I think I asked for money twice. Then he started lecturing. He would ask when we’d be intimate and told me how good he was at fallacious. I told him I wasn’t ready. Each time he’d ask, he’d get the same answer. Then he was like I had to be giving it up to someone else? How, when again my work hours don’t allow me to and Im spending my free time with him? Then he asked, “You can go this long without having sex? Yes, I’ve gone two years without it. It’s not that important, and Fifty made me dislike it sort to speak. But I bet when I find someone that makes me tingle, I’d ve back. Besides Old school was old school, I couldn’t see me being intimate with him and I damn sure wasn’t sexually attracted to him Bis dying cough alone turned me off, the way he ate his food turned me off, his commentary while watching movies also turned me off.

They both said they’d do things for me, and they didn’t. And I only asked if I was in a bind, and that was rare. Sexually they didn’t do it for me. They both wanted to lecture me. There are a few other things, but maybe I’ll put that in a short story or book.

So, at the end of the day, I’ve come to the conclusion that no matter the age, most men are the same. You know what? I will write a short story about this.